Joyful Ruins

Feeling safe

after trauma

does not happen all at once

but in steps

like the knitting of a blanket

to cover you

or the building of a bridge

to cross

Sometimes it may come

instantly

with certain people who already feel safe

Through hugs

or words

or presence

but most of the time

it will come

without much notice

Just a moment

your shoulders relax

your mind quiets

Those times you search for something concrete

to worry over

and find it is hard to do

the calming of your soul and body

They may be fleeting at first

but if they show at all

Safety is being rebuilt

And as I wrote this, it is hard to believe. My jaw is tight, my worries numerous, my shoulders tense. When I write that it is like knitting a blanket or building a bridge, I mean, it is painfully slow, sometimes hard to see any progress, but those small moments it is realized matter. ❤️