Joyful Ruins

I have always considered myself a fairly compassionate and loving person. However, this season of pandemic, lock downs, social injustice, racial tensions, and polarization, has stretched my concept of love and compassion.

Due to the unique season, the question of, “How can I love others?” has drastically changed, expanding wonderfully to make me more tenderhearted and aware of the needs of others than I was prior to covid19.

Am I loving others when I choose not to wear a mask? Am I loving others when I stay home and physically distance myself? Am I loving others when I debate with them on facebook? Am I loving others when I listen more than speak? (I would go even further to ask, am I loving the most vulnerable when….?)

All of these are valid questions and to some the answers are obvious. I know I can’t please everyone, but how can I show them I love them? That is the question I want to answer.

It is interesting how acts of love in my life have now become much smaller and less visible, yet are richer and seem more meaningful to those they touch.

When my choice to say home or to wear a mask says, “I love you” to those who I might expose to sickness, says “I love you” to my roommate insuring she is healthy and safe, says “I love you” to the grocery clerk who has to work as an essential service, and says “I love you” to the healthcare workers fighting a battle I know very little about, I realize the small act of love which “costs” me very little covers over a multitude of people, and the benefits far outweigh that “cost”.

That is just the beginning, as there is much more to learn about love in this time, wearing a mask is just a start. Of course, it is much easier for me to wake up and live my day wondering how I can make myself more comfortable, communicate only my needs. When I start my day that way, I find myself growing irritable, impatient, defensive, and prideful when others seem to be taking away my comfort. Those days are when I forget that I have never been called to live for myself or my comfort, but to live for Christ and to put others needs before my own.

God has soften me in ways I never thought possible. I began this season irritable, impatient, unconcerned, self-focused, and unaware. God has turned that upside down for me (not to say I am perfect in this, nor will I ever be). He has shown me new ways to love: sending a birthday video to a friend on facebook, extending patience and joy to my roommate, taking hers and others’ comfort and well-being into account, understanding someone’s point of view before assuming I know exactly what they think, reading books about racial injustice, and many more examples.

I am grateful for these lessons dealt so piercingly yet lovingly. Still, I have to choose to silence my own voice each day, the one crying for my own comfort, the approval of others, rushing to defend my  views, and bristling over with self-righteousness. Instead, I have to choose (And get to choose!) to uplift the voice of the Spirit saying, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves.” Philippians 2:3

When I frame my actions within that voice, my day looks very different and I see God work wonders in others’ hearts and lives.

Tell me how you have learned to love in new ways during this season. If you feel you need to confess some ways you have been unloving during this time, do so now, God will forgive you and help you see how to love more like Him.